Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

I can't believe that 2011 is almost at an end!!! Crazy!!! It's been a pretty good year if I do say so myself!! We had a few great mini-vacays...got to spend lot's of quality time together and got oh-so-many pics (which I really planned on sharing with y'all, but never quite got around to it!!). I really couldn't have asked for a better year and I'm sure hoping that 2012 will be just as fantastic and filled with many more happy memories with my lil' fam!!!

I'm finally done my Christmas shopping (I think), just have to wrap 2 more gifts!! Woohoo!!!! Then I plan on kicking back, putting my feet up and snuggling up in my new bed with the hubby!! (we have yet to try out the new mattresses...can't wait!!). Afterall, it is Christmas Eve Eve!!

I truly hope that you all have had a terrific year and that you have the happiest of Christmas' with you're families and friends!! There's nothing better than creating these memories each and every year and then looking back at them and realizing just how great life is and how truly lucky we are.

                                                                                           

To Spend or Not to Spend...............

As our girlie gets older, I'm finding it harder and harder to get her gifts for Christmas!!! I thought that it would actually be easier to shop for her, but I was sadly mistaken!!! They are much more particular about what they want and what they will wear.....what is "cool" and what is NOT!!! I N-E-V-E-R thought it would be this hard!!! But thankfully, her mom and I get along great and we are able to "discuss" what her likes and dis-likes are!! Phew!!!

 I am almost done shopping for her!!!! I think she'll be happy with what she gets!! I'm trying soooooo hard to make the right choices and get her age appropriate things!!! This whole Tweens thing is a little complicated!! haha!!!!! But I'm positive that she'll be pleased!!!!

  We've decided that we aren't going to spend a fortune this year...everyone has everything that they want(including our girlie), so this year?!?!?! I hope you're happy with what you get!!! hehe!!

  I hope you are all enjoying being out and shopping for x-mas...it's alot of fun, but can also be alot of work!!!! I say let's try and enjoy every minute...even the stressful ones and make the best of it!!!!! Family ROCKS......and I wouldn't give up all the shopping stress and spending for nothing if it means I get to see a huge smile on their faces !!!!

Someone's Missing.......

The house seems a little to quiet for me right now.....no dirty dishes, no in and out of the garage...yep, you know what that means.....the Hubs isn't here!!!!! Is that a good thing??!?! Well, I think time apart is always a good thing, I mean, absence makes the heart grow fonder, right???? The Hubs went to spend Thanksgiving with our friends (family) in Ohio, and, well......I'd be lying if I said that I didn't miss him terribly!!!! I'm feeling kinda lonely!!!!

   He'll be on his way home tomorrow, which I can hardly wait!!!!! You just don't realize how much you truly love someone until you are apart for awhile!!! I sat here today and thought about what life would be like if he were never coming back...I mean, I'm not trying to be depressing or morbid, but it's reality....life is short and it's precious.........I actually had tears come to my eyes when I thought about my life without him...........I just want him home safe and sound!!!!!! I've been keeping busy and doing some Christmas shopping for our Girlie.....(got some A-W-E-S-O-M-E deals, by the way)...., doing some crafting and of course, some cleaning and laundry!!!! Good times!!!!

 Our Christmas cards are all ready to go....I made them myself, my sis took our yearly family photo, I put them all together and Voila!!!!!!! Our cards are awesome!!!!!!!! Can't wait to send them out!!!! Here are a couple of pics. from the photo shoot!!!!!!! The first one is the one we used for our card....the rest????? Just some awesome pics of my little fam!!!!!!

                                                                                   

A new craftroom!!!! Woohoo!!!

     It's finally happened!!!! I have an awesome new craftroom!!!! The Hubs bought me two awesome white cabinets to use as storage and I did some painting to turn the "old" into the "new"....and I L-O-V-E it!!!! I don't want to go as far as to say that it's my "dream" craftroom, but it's pretty darn close!!!! It has tonnes of storage, it's bright and cheery and it's totally me!!! I couldn't ask for more!!!!!!! Here's a sneek peek at it....I'll take some more pics. when I have it totally together!!!

                                                                                     

Christmas Crafting!!

So I'm totally on this bracelet making kick and I decided to make some super cute bracelets!!! I think they are so adorable, and can be worn while dressed up or dressed down....I recently made one for our Girlie and her lil' sis...and they were a hit!!! Here's a pic.....let me know what ya think!!!!

                                                                                        

Out with Halloween and in with Christmas!!!!

I know, I know....I'm jumping the gun a little, but I love the holidays!!! Thanksgiving and Halloween are now behind us and Christmas is sneeking up on us pretty quickly!!! I just finished putting all the Halloween decorations away and started going through the Christmas stuff!!!! Don't worry...I didn't actually take any out, just looked!! haha!!!! I'm going to try and purge some stuff (cuz I want to get more....hehe!!), and this year I have finally talked the Hubs into putting up Christmas lights!! YAY!!!! I can't wait to do this...there will be pics. to follow of course!!!

  I've already started making my Christmas cards (which look FAB I might add), and my sis is going to take a family photo for us for the front of the card!!! It's going to look great!!! (pictures to follow of that another time!!)

  I've been doing lot's of crafting lately and my new love is bracelet making!! I'm obsessed!!!! I've made a few, given some away and now have orders for some Christmas ones!!!! Take a looksy below and see what ya think!!!!!!! I love making them and they are so quick and easy!!!!

   Aside from those few things, not much is new!! I may be having surgery on my wrist soon, but that's no biggie, and everything else is going great!!! No complaints here....I have a great life, an awesome little Fam....what more could I possibly as for!?!?!?! :)

                                                                                     

Undecided....

So I stopped blogging for quite some time because truthfully????, I was feeling a little creeped out by the whole thing!! I dunno.....complete strangers reading about MY life?!?!?! Anyhow...I've decided to pop back into the wonderful world of blogging because quite simply.......I miss you guys!!!!! Hopefully I won't be freaked out again and go back into hibernation cuz I love reading your blogs and seeing what's going on in your lives!!! You guys ROCK!!!

Walking Withdrawl

Ugh!!! I missed my daily scheduled power walk this morning and let me tell ya......It's eating away at me!!!!! My workout buddy hurt her knee and wasn't up to going out this morning, and yeah, I could have went, but I started cleaning the house and doing the laundry, and then before I knew it 2 hours had gone by. The guilt is eating away at me, so I'm definetly going to get some excercise in today at some point so I don't go CRAZY!!!!!

   I'm in a real mood today. No particular reason, other than I feel kinda frustrated that I'm not always able to do the things that I want to do, when I want to do them!!!! Selfish?!?! Maybe, but hello....I work my butt off at work, worry about making everyone around me happy and then I'm left feeling a little bit ticked that no one seems to care that I have things that I want to do!!!!!Whatever...that's life I guess!!!!
Guess I really do need that exercise to get those "happy" endorphins pumping through my body!!!

Weight Loss Week 1

..So I've FINALLY had enough of procrastinating and putting off getting in shape!!! I know I've done this like a million times..ya know....start, stop, start, stop, but the difference this time?!?!? I have a workout partner that is as motivated as me!!!! This really helps!!! I've set a mini-goal of losing some weight before Thanksgiving weekend, which since I'm in Canada, is in about, oh, I'd say 5 weeks give or take. I'm not looking to drop major weight by then, but I'd love to be starting to feel comfprtable in my own skin.

   I decided that having a "target outfit" would be helpful in keeping me on track, so I bought this awesome sweater and I have a pair of jeans in mind as well that I'd like to look half decent in. My Hubs thought that I was crazy in putting this kind of pressure on myself, but if I don't.....I'll give up to easily. I also started taking some Green Tea/Apple cider vinegar capsules. Apparently they are very helpful in achieving weight loss, that is, if you are exercising and eating a healthy diet along with it (which I am).

   So there you have it folks!!! I've now informed you that I'm going to DO THIS!!!!! So now I really can't fail because I wouldn't want to have to write a post about that, now would I?!?!?!?!

A surprise for the Hubs!!!

 So I have today, tomorrow and, well, the whole long weekend off!!! Yay for me!!!! But the Hubs???, he has to work today and tomorrow still. To say that he was a tad jelous is a slight understatement, but ya know what?!?!?! I'm going to make it worth his while!!!

  I got up early this morning (when I could have lounged in bed for as long as I wanted) and cleaned the house, changed the bedding and washed our duvet cover and shams. Then I plan on making a special spaghetti sauce with spinach, peppers and some other great veggies in it for our dinner, and, oh...did I mention the yummy garlic bread to go with it???? I think (no, I KNOW) he'll love it!!!!

  I even made sure that some of his favourite beer is still in the fridge cuz ya know that your man will be thankful for a "cold one" after a long day at work!!!! I may even *ahem*....crack out the "nice" undies for him to ogle and appreciate!!! Hahaha.....I know...to much info, and it's not that I wear hideous undies on a daily basis, I just go for comfort more often than not. So, just for him, I'll wear the ones that usually stay tucked in the back of the drawer for special occasions!!!!

  He'll be a happy camper when he comes home!!!! House smells (and looks) great, food to be eaten, beer in the fridge....what else could a man want?!?!?!?!?!?!

Feeling Thankful!!!!

....Huh, well...for some reason the word "thankful looks like it's spelled wrong to me!!!! Is it?!?!? I'm not sure!!! Do you ever have that happen..ya know, where you've spelled the word like a billion times but this one time it looks totally wrong?!?!?!? Oh well.....let me know if it is cuz I can't figure it out right now!!

   So I'm feeling pretty thank-ful today...like, I'm REALLY lucky for alot of great things in my life and I just thought that I should point some of those things out b/c I'm sure that I don't say it enough!!!!

   So here it goes......
- I am so lucky to have a husband that loves me unconditionally each and EVERDAY!!!! I'm always beautiful in his eyes and that means the world to me!!!

- I have great friends....especially my one friend whom I know is always there for me and never judges me....she ROCKS!!!

- I have the most awsome step-daughter!!! She is my world!!! She is so respectful and caring and super, super smart!!!!! She ROCKS to!!!!

- I have a really great job..(not fun or anything) but stable, well paying and with full benefits!!! I have nothing to complain about!!

- I can usually get what I want when I want..and not in a bad way!!!!! Our bills are always paid, things taken care of and I am still lucky enough to be able to splurge on myself (and my hubs and girlie) whenever I want!!!

- I have awesome hair..o.k....it looks pretty crappy lately, but really??? my hair will do whatever I want it to, and I love that!!!

-  I love that I am someones wife and step-mom!!!!! I am inportant to them and play an important role in their lives and they let me know that I matter!!

    These are just a few things that I'm so Thankful for!!!!!! Sometimes you just have to step back and take a look around!!!! It's a good life!!!!

                                                    My Loves!!!!!!!!!

"Yadda,Yadda..."

     Well.....life is kinda at a standstill right now. Work is.....well, work. My body is still packing on weight and bloating out in E-V-E-R-Y direction and my knee still aches. Yep...fun eh???? We were looking at houses like crazy people and even found 2 that we really loved, but then one night I was laying and bed and had this little niggling feeling that I just couldn't shake....what was it you ask?!?! Well......I didn't want anyone else living in MY house!!!! Is that totally strange???? I dunno....we've put alot of ourselves and our hearts into this house AND redone it from top to bottom!!! But maybe, just maybe if our dream house pops up, those feelings will go away.

   Aside from those "thrilling" things.....nothing to exciting. My Bff's baby girl is as precious as ever and I cannot wait to hold her again!!!! Babies ROCK!!!! Life is really, truly great and looking at this precious little girl reminds me of that. I may complain about my woes, aches and pains and many other things but hey, I'm human!!!!  Just gotta make the best of it and deal with what you are given!!!

It's time to get R-E-A-L!!!!!

   I've been thinking alot about my (old)BFF.....we've been friends for quite awhile and we used to do alot together and talk to each other.....but lately???? Nothing. When we do talk (which is so very rare), there just isn't anything to talk about. I mean, she's a great person, but I'm finding that she's become a little "snobby". She travels all over with her hubby, which is great...and she has a killer body that she works really hard on, which is also great, but she's sooooo judgemental about others. She picks apart what people wear, or how big they got while pregnant....(not cool.......your bringing another life into the world.) I jsut don't feel that we have anything in common anymore. I don't think she's ever ONCE made me a prioroty...even when I was going through the worst of the worst. Isn't that what true friends do?!?!?!

    Maybe I'm wrong, or maybe I'm the one who has changed...o.k...I know I've changed, but for the better!!! I used to be a more selfish person, but not any longer. Life is way to short to be that way!!! I'm just not sure if it's worth remaining friends anymore. I want to be around positive people...people who won't be looking at my muffin-top with disgust!!!!! I don't know what to do. Guess I'll ponder it for a bit longer and hopefully figure it out.

She's FINALLY here!!!

   Yesterday at 5:35pm another angel came into this world!!! One of my (most deserving) BFF'S gave birth to a little girl...Cassandra (Cassie) Magdalene.....and she is absolutely beautiful!!!!! She weighed in at 5lbs, 12ozs. and she is just the tiniest little thing!!!! I can't wait to hold her and breathe in that baby smell again!!!!!

                                                                                          

C'mon baby Cassie!!!

    My poor BFF is now 8 days past her due date and is staring to get very anxious and edgy!!!! She's tired, has swollen feet and has to pee every 5 minutes!!! Now....I can't say that I know what this feels like, but I hate seeing her feel so miserable!!!! Her hubby is working 3-11pm all week, so I think that this Wednesday I'm going to pop in for a visit (that is, if she hasn't gone into labor or been induced yet) to try and cheer her up!!!! I'm thinking I should bring something with me....something for the mommy-to-be.....but what?!?!?! I'm no expert, so I'm relying on all you mommies out there to tell me what a super-pregnant mommy-to-be needs right about now!!!!! She's the bestest friend that a girl could ever ask for, so please give me some ideas as to what she could really use right now!!!!!

                                             ~ Keeping my fingers crossed for baby Cassie to come! ~

                                                                                             

Wow....it's been awhile!!!

   I can't believe how long it's been since I've been on here!!! I've been so busy with work, vacations and just plain old household things!! I've popped in once and awhile to read what's been going on in your lives, and everytime I swear that I'm going to put up some pics. of our vacations..etc......but I never get around to it!!!

   Right now we are currently re-doing our basement, so that means I'm seriously B-U-S-Y!!!! Our girlie is here right now helping daddy put the floor in!!! SOOOOO CUTE!!! ( I may snap a quick photo to share with you...which I'm sure they will both dislike!!) Anyhow.....life has been very busy!!! I'm hoping to have a little down time sometime later on tonight that will allow me to catch up on some things!!! I hope that some of you will continue to pop in on me..even though I haven't been very good at getting on here lately!!!! I plan to catch up on all of your happenings tonight, so please keep in touch...I'm still around!!!
               

                                                                                          

I'm Baaaaaaaaaack..from vacation that is!!!

    So we had a fantastic week away...the Hubs, our Girlie and I.....our little Fam.!!!! We spent most of our week at the beach swimming and soaking in the sun....but truthfully???? Just having the 3 of us together was all that mattered!!! We really got to enjoy some quality time together as a family!!!

  I probably took about a million pictures (which I WILL post eventually)...I'm sure our girlie was sick of me making her smile and look cute...but really...is there such a thing as to many pictures?!?!?! I want to capture all the memories!!! :) All in all...it was great!!!! There's nothing I love more than having the 2 people I love the most with me for an entire week!!! They're the B-E-S-T!!!!! Anyhow....I do promise to put some pictures up....maybe even later on tonight!!! I hope you all had a fantastic week like I did and I can't wait to catch up on all the happenings later on!!!

One more day to go!!!!!

FINALLY!!!!  Tomorrow is my last day of work and them I'm off for 10 whole days!!!! WHOOPEE!!!! I can't wait to relax with the Hubs and our Girlie and to hit the beach for some family fun!! It'll be great to get away and spend some quality time together!! (it's about time!!!!). I'm sure that I will be toting the camera around the entire time snapping some memories (what wife/mommy doesn't????) so there'll be lot's of pics to post for you to see!!!!

   We are going out for a little lunch/celebration at work tomorrow and I'm totally looking forward to it!! We work so damn hard all year (and even harder in the summer) that I think we deserve this little treat!!! I'm exhausted, tired and my left arm/shoulder is pretty much finished for awhile!!! Bring on the food and drinks!!!! It's VACATION TIME!!!!!!

   I'm going to make up a journal for both my girlie and myself to write down things that we do on our summer vacation!! I thought that this would be a great idea since she will usually tell you that she doesn't remember what she did!! haha!! She makes me laugh!!! Anyhow....I'm going to try and get cracking on those tonight, so I'll post some pics. of how they turn out!!! I think that it'll be something really fun for her and I to do together!!!

   Well, I'm pooped......I need a shower badly, but all I could do was sit down and check out all your blogs with a nice cold drink!!!! I've got lot's to do, so I'd better at it or it'll never get done!! I'll hopefuly get some pictures up soon so there'll be more for you to enjoy!!!!

Rain, Rain Go Away, We have a soccer game to play!!!

   Ugh!!! It is sooooo dark and dreary out this morning and it looks as though it's going to rain cats and dogs!!! Our Girlies soccer game starts in and hour and a half and I'm REALLY hoping that this rain holds off..(not looking as though that will happen!!). It's kind of chilly out too....going to have to bundle up and bring the umbrella!!!! Keeping my fingers crossed that we'll see our little girl kick the ball around this morning!!!!

                                                                                        

Where Do I Fit In???

   Lately my thoughts are all over the place. I'm happy, sad, anxious....then happy again. What the heck?!?!? I have so many friends who are mommies, or are soon-to-be momnies...and truthfully????? I just don't know where I fit in anymore.

   I have some pretty great friends..some that still fit me in even though I'm not a part of the "mommy club". (I often fear losing friends because they can no longer relate to me because I've never given birth to my own child).  It's a realistic fear, one that those who can have children don't understand. It's just a natural thing I think, that people who have children naturally gravitate towards others who have children because, really????, they can relate. So how the heck can I ever fit in?!?!??!

   I have to say that one of my BFF'S has always made me feel included since day one. She's always talked to me about her pregnancy....always asked my opinion(even though I have NO CLUE what I'm talking about) and even calls me Auntie Kristy to her unborn little girl. Now that...is a true friend...one who will be there till the end, who will never abandon me and who I know truly knows all that I have been through and is and will ALWAYS be there for me. Nough' said.

   I just want to belong. I didn't CHOOSE to not have a baby....I WANT to go to "mommy groups" and do "mommy things"...but fate has chosen different things for me. I WANT to fit in and feel like I'm a part of something.....I just haven't found that little group yet. Hopefully soon I will fit in somewhere and feel like I belong.

Post 100!!!

Wow.....100 posts....didn't think I'd make that since there were a few times that I debated even continuing with this blog!! I mean, how many people really stop by and read about my non-interesting life?? :)

   I am so thrilled that it's Friday!! I'm really looking forward to our Girlies soccer game tomorrow morning, that is, if it doesn't rain!! We missed her game last weekend which really bothered me......I don't ever want her to think that we didn't want to be there, and I'm sure she knows that that would NEVER be the case if we couldn't come, but still....I dunno, I guess I'm just to much of a worrier!!

   The countdown is on till my Bff has this baby girl of hers!!! I think I'm more excited than she is, but I'm just anxious to hold her.....there is nothing quite like holding a brand new baby and I figure since it will never be mine that I'm holding...I may as well enjoy everyone elses!!!! This little girl is going to be spoiled rotten!!!

   My hands and wrist have been killing me lately!!! I know that I have a cyst in the one wrist that will be requiring surgery in October, but lately both hands/wrist have been sore. Work is just so repetitve and I think the  wear and tear is catching up with me. Not sure how I'm going to do this job of mine for 24 more years!! haha!!!

   Well...I think that's about all I have to rant about right now.....I was up early for work so I figured what a good time to post my 100th blog!!! I'll be cheking in sometime later on to catch up on some of your blogs!!! Have a fantastic Friday everyone!!!

Blogger troubles!!!

I've been trying to post my blogs on here for the last couple of days, but every time I go to post them, some "error" thing comes up and POOF, there goes my blog!!! So I'm keeping this one short and sweet in case it happens again!!!!  Father's Day was great!!! The Hubs, our Girlie and I spent a wonderful, sunny day going bike riding, hanging out and going for a picnic lunch!!! I loved spending the day with my loves....they ROCK!!!! I have a few pics. of our day, but for now I'm going to leave you with one of The Hubs and our Girlie!! (I take a pic. of them every year so that we can compare!!!)

                                                                                   

A Treasury of Cards....

Each and every year, my girlie and I try and create a photo card of her to give her dad on Father's Day, and sometimes his Birthday!!! This Father's Day there wasn't going to be enough time for our girlie and I to get together and some up with the annual photo, so being the creative person that I am, I came up with a collage of some photos from over the years and created, what I think, is a F-A-N-T-A-S-T-I-C Father's Day card for this year!! Here is a collage of some of the previous cards, as well as this years card!!! (The one that is the collage that says Dad in the corner.....just in case you weren't sure!!!) Hope you like!!!

                                                                                       

"Ten On Tuesday"

1.   Ugh.....I got my first migraine in two years today!!! I'm still feeling crappy and I'm really hoping that this isn't a sign of their impending return!!


2.   I've also had an annoying pain in my left shoulder, upper back and chest area. I'm thinking I just pulled something at work, though me being the worrier that I am, also though of heart attack!! lol!!! well, I guess it isn't that since I'm still alive and kicking!!


3.   I (we) miss our girlie so, so much!! We had to give up our last weekend with her and half of this coming weekend, so it will be almost an entire month of not getting to spend time with her!!! BOO to that!!


4.   As mentioned in my last post, my Bff's baby shower was a hit!! We had lot's of fun, and LOT'S of food!!! She was happy and that's all that mattered!! We have a lunch date set for this Friday and I can't wait!!


5.   I had a little melt down today....o.k.....I was being a little dramatic, but hell, it's sooooo frustrating when nothing will fit you because your chest is so large...and, well, other stuff to I guess. I came home and I could feel the tears coming. I walked in the house and I think the Hubs knew I'd just had a bad shopping trip. I walked straight to our room, flopped on the bed and started crying. He came and patted my back (and told me that I'm not fat...) and then I fell asleep for an hour. Guess I was just tired???


6.   I am counting down till we are off on holidays!!! 12 more work days to be exact!!!! We are taking our girlie away for a few days, so I'm sure it will be a great time!!


7.   I've been faithfully doing my power walks every morning, but I'm getting discouraged because I just don't see any weight coming off!! I know it takes time, but holy hell.....hurry up!!!!!


8.   Oh, did I mention that I tried a bathing suit on today???? Yeah, B-I-G mistake!!!! Ugh....I guess that that's probably what triggered my meltdown!!


9.   I'm still trying to figure out how to do a header for my blog with pictures in it! I can make my own, but then it ends up ginormous, even when I fit it to size!!! I'll figure out one day!! I really do need a better one!!


10.   My Bff (the one who's shower I helped at), got me a GC to get my nails done, so I'm pretty pumped that I may actually have girly, pretty hands soon......The Hubs will like it when he gets his backed scratched!! (and not the way you're thinking.....so dirty!!! hehe!!)

This little Girl is already sooooo loved!!!

   Today was one of my BFF'S baby shower. There were about 40 people and it was at a really nice hall.....quite pretty, really. My friend truly, truly deserves this baby (a little girl...yay!!!). She has been through alot and has been there for me through all my ups and downs. Let me tell you....this little girl received so many wonderful gifts today...and my friend??? There was so much love in that room today for her and her unborn little girl.....I can't wait to hold her, cuddle her and love her to bits!!! I may not be family, but I'll love and adore her just the same!!! I will leave you with a pic. of me and my bestie and the sweet lil' girl that will bless us soon with her presence!!!

                                                                                          

"Ten on Tuesday"

1.   Today I made a phonecall and threatened legal action if a problem wasn't fixed IMMEDIATELY!!!! I'm not usually this harsh, but enough is enough!!! Needless to say the guy called back!! It remains to be seen if the problem gets solved!!


2.   I miss our girlie sooooo much!!! It was our weekend to have her this past weekend, but she had soccer all day Saturday, then her friends b-day party after that was a sleepover......we didn't want to spend the day Sunday driving all day, so we gave up our weekend so she could have fun.....now the next weekend we have her she has her mom's work party all day Saturday.....needless to say we won't see her much that weekend either!!! *sigh*


3.   My new "job" is going great so far!!! It is friggin awesome knowing where I'm going to be each and everyday.....and no more random phonecalls!!!!!!


4.  One of my BFF's baby shower is this weekend!!! Normally I would totally dread this event.....but I'm just way to happy for her to feel this way!!! I think it's going to be a great day!!!! I will post pictures after the grand event!!!


5.   I almost...ALMOST contemplated not going to work yesterday!!! I felt like crap.....but my job isn't rocket science, so I suffered and went in anyways!! Glad that I didn't waste a sick day!!


6.   I am counting down the days till we get outta this city!! We have 3 more weeks till we leave on our little vacation......with our Girlie of course!!!!! I love having our family time together!!!


7.    I am trying to figure out what we're going to do for the Hubs Father's Day card this year!! Every year our Girlie and I do some kind of fun picture of her, and make a Father's Day card out of it!!! It gets harder each and every year to come up with something new!!! Gonna have to rack my brains out this year!!


8.   I went out dress shopping this morning to look for something to wear to my Bff's baby shower!!! There are some pretty cute dresses, but let me tell ya....when you have a large chest.....NOTHING fits like it should!!! It's sooooooo depressing!!!


9.   Is it sad that I'm already wishing it was Friday?!?!!? The Hubs and I have plans to hit a patio for lunch after our Girlies soccer game!!! I enjoy this time together......we sit and chat about stuff going on and things that we want to do!!!! It's great!!!


10.   I bought a new climbing plant today for the garden...I know, not exciting.....but they are my babies and I'm excited to see it start to bloom and twine its way around things!!!!! (o.k.....I need to get a life, but whatever!!!)

In search of a "baby" book for me!!!

So it's not what it looks like....no pregnancy happening here...but I've been on the search for a somewhat humorous book to read about not being able to have babies. I'm trying to be much more positive these days, but I would really like some reading material...something to enlighten me!!! Do any of you know of any good reads????? I'm still looking into getting an E-reader, so that way I can just download stuff!!! Any help or suggestions that you may have would be HUGELY appreciated!!!!!

I'm still here!!

Just in case you were wondering (or were ever so worried..haha), I'm still around and still reading all of your blogs. I've just been so super busy at my new workplace and at home as well!! We've done so much work outside, and of course, taking care of the gardens......I'm POOPED!!!! As soon as I get a chance I will write a much more interesting blog.....maybe with some photos too!!! Hope you are all well.....I'm still reading and thinking of you!!!!!

I am Blessed with the Best!!

   As you all may know, I finally got a permanent position at work which means that I am no longer on call both day and night, I don't have to drive all over the place and I can now make plans!!! WOOHOO!!! My poor Hubs has had to listen to me gripe, complain and sometimes even cry over how much I hated my job and how frayed my nerves were getting. He was probably at his witts end with me I'm sure. Anyhow, last night was my last shift on Relief and I couldn't wait for 11pm to get here. When I came home I did the usual shower, wash the make-up off thing and then headed downstairs to meet up with the Hubs. When I sat down on the couch, a square of white caught my eye, and there sitting on the table was a card addressed to me....or "to My Lovely Wife" as he calls me!! How sweet, caring and thoughtful of him!! I truly am blessed with a great husband, one who thought of last night as a special day!!! I love him so much!!!! Here's a picture of my cherished little card!!!!!

I have to tell you that all those little stickers are because he made a mistake and had to cover it up!!!!!!!                                                                                          

Where have all the good people gone?!?!?!

   I seem to have been running into some pretty damn selfish people lately. I must say, these are generally the people that I dislike the most. What the hell makes you so damn important that nobody else matters??? There's one person in particular that at times makes my blood just boil. They play the role of perfection to a tee...but let me tell ya..there's an evil little selfish greed monster hiding underneath that facade. It makes me sick to see sometimes. And you know what's even worse?????? They get everything that they want!!! It just isn't fair!!!!!

   I'm not saying I'm perfect by any means...I have my moments where I only want to care about myself, to be number one....but that's not to often. I try each and everyday to put others first, to help people out and to not gripe and complain about all the shit I have to go through and the things that I will never have, but at least I'm real and sincere. What you see is what you get!!!!! No doubt about that!!!

   All I'm wishing for is for "these" people to open their eyes......Life is so-damn-short....stop being greedy, stop trying to be a control freak....you may just be surprised how much nicer it is when you can be real and caring!!!!

Dear Body....

   To my dearest Body,

     I know that you and I have had a "love/hate" relationship for the last little while, but do you think that you could give me a break?? I'm tired of fighting with you, of asking you to do things that you don't want to do and of course, all the weight that you keep packing on!!

    I started a little battle against you today by going for a 1 hour power walk..TAKE THAT!! I'm hoping to punish you each and everyday till I see that extra weight slip away!! I know you'll be feeling some pain tomorrow!! Haha!!

    I know that you took the greatest gift that there is away from me (that of having a baby), but you know what??? I think I may be starting to forgive you. I have ALOT of great things in my life to embrace and be thankful for and I've let you win that battle for far to long!!! It's my turn to be happy and start living everday to its fullest instead of dwelling on how much I despise you. So just so you know.....my mood will be changing ALOT, so get used to it!!

    That's all I have to say to you for now.....I'm taking my body back, and you and your negative ways can go elsewhere!!!

                                                                                          Ever so sincerely,
                                                                                                          Kristy

Gardens and lonely eggs...

   The rain finally held off long enough for me to get all of my gardens weeded and planted!! It looks sooooo much better now, and will look even better once they start to grow and bloom!!! My hands are now a big, huge mess, but totally worth all the work (and money) that it took!!


     While I was down at the back of the yard cutting the grass, a little flash of color caught my eye. I bent down to see what it was and realized that it was a blue robins egg!!! Not sure why the sight of an abandoned egg makes me feel a little sad..(probably b/c I think that the mom bird is wondering where her future hatchling is..)...so I took it over to the neighbours bird house tree and plopped it into one of the houses. Now...I'm trying to convince myself that one of those mommy birds will think that that egg is theirs and sit on it...or I just did something really dumb!! Oh well.....I'm trying to give this little baby a fair chance....we'll see that comes out of that house in awhile!!!

                                                                                             

Looooooong weekend!!

   What a great long weekend we've had so far!!! Yesterday we went out "treasure hunting"..(or metal detecting..). My in-laws got me a metal detector for Christmas and this was the first really nice day that we've had for us to go out and try it. We didn't actually find any treasure per say...but we did find a matal button snap............at least we know it works!!

    We took our girlie outside last night to light some sparklers....it is, after all the long weekend!!!! I got her to swirl and spin the sparkler around trying to capture some cool pics....I got a few....it was fun!!!

  I miss her SO now that she is gone home. Our house is quiet, there is no one to pick up after..*sigh*...oh well...I can spend the day tomorrow tending to my gardens!!!! I hope you're all have a terrific weekend...I'm still keeping my fingers crossed that the weather man is wrong about tomorrow and we'll have nothing but sun!!!!!!

                                                                                               

What it's really like...........

    I don't really want to go on and on about not being able to pro-create, but here's a few things to let you know what it really, truly feels like....

     Your heart really does break every time you see a pregnant women or a mommy holding their childs hand.

      I would give ANYTHING for a stomach full of stretchmarks, sore boobs and sleepless nights.

      I hate the fact that I will NEVER feel a baby moving around in my belly.

      There will never be a part of me left here when I leave this earth. That's kinda sad...... :(

       Who is gong to take care of me when I'm old???? (I've seen this time and time again...so sad!!)

        I will never get to pick out baby clothes for my baby. (and I love to shop for babies!!)

        What would a little person that was  a mix of me and the Hubs look like???? (I'll never know!!)

         Why am I such a failure?!?!?! Why did I have to have a broken body??????

         I will never know what it's like to see/hold MY baby for the first time.....*sniff*

    ...........................O.K....I could go on and on......but I don't want to depress all of you..I just want to be totally honest about the thoughts and feelings that I feel on a daily basis. It's really hard sometimes, and there are some really dark days...but ya know what??????? I believe that it has to be me for a reason, and I don't wish this upon anyone!!   All you Mommies out there are so special, lucky and blessed. I would give anything to have that for just one day!! Enjoy each and everyday with your lil' ones....be proud of those stretch marks and extra pounds. You are amazing!!! I wish that I could be just like you..all-the-time....but you know what?????? I'm meant for something else!!! I'm still waiting to find out what it is!!!!

    

Say What?!?!?!

   So..as mentioned yesterday (and maybe the day before, and the day before that), I had to go for my physical this morning. I hate them sooooo much, but I do know that they are very important to have. So I got up early, showered, shaved (very important for these kind of appointments) and got ready to head out the door. Ugh....I felt nervous....things just never go right for me in this department.

   Anyhow....I got to the office, checked in and waited for about 5 mins before I was ushered into the room. The doc. came in, asked me the usual questions and then went to see when my last pap with her was. She thought it had been a while, but really I had had one with my gyno. a year ago. I told her this and you know what she said???? ...to only get undressed from the waist up.....wait....did I hear that right?????? She left the room (to let me get undressed of course) and the whole time I was wondering if I had misheard her.....well..I did what she asked, while feeling confused. When she came back, I asked If I had heard her right, she said I sure did. Then she told me that I could have my pap with my gyno. What the hell?!?!?  Does that not make that appointment a total waste of time????? Now I have to make ANOTHER appointment for a pap. Ugh...well, at least he is totally awesome and super quick and efficient. Let's just say that that appointment didn't quite go as I had thought it would!!!!

A ray of light on a gloomy day (or week)

  As mentioned before, we have had sooooooo much rain everyday that it was starting to get really depressing. (well, it's still pretty glum even today). However, yesterday I got the call that I have been waiting for for an entire year..(and no, I'm not pregnant!!). My supervisor called me to tell me that I was the top person to apply for a position!!! You know what that means?!?!?!?!? It means no more daily phone calls, no more not knowing if I'm working mornings or afternoons and now I will always know where I'll be going every-single-day!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!! Oh, and did I mention that it is also the same hours that the Hubs works, so now we will actually get to see eachother??!!!  This was my little ray of sunshine on such a crappy day!!! I couldn't have gotten better news!!

   Tomorrow is the dreaded physical (yuck!!!). Still feeling dread that something will be wrong, but really trying to be hopeful!!! I shouldn't complain...people have to go through alot worse than I've gone through, so really, It's kind of selfish of me. And really??? A physical only lasts like 5 minutes...hell, you're at the dentist longer!!! At least by this time tomorrow it will all be over with!!! Wish me luck!! I will let you know tomorrow if I survived!!!! :)

Ten on Tuesday

1.   The invitations are done!! That was a whole lot of work, but totally worth it to see my friends face light up when she saw them!!


2.   This rainy weather is starting to get to me...ALOT. I'm not sure I can take to much more of being trapped indoors, feeling cold and damp! Where the hell is the sun???


3.   I just had coffee with a friend from work....it was really great to find out that we are ALOT alike!! It was also nice to chat with another female instead of the Hubs..(sorry honey, I love you but sometimes ya just need another woman.)


4.   Work is still work. I'm really sick of that too. The phone calls everyday to find out where I'm going are starting to get very annoying and I can't wait for the day when the phone stops ringing.


5.   I'm totally dreading my upcoming physical on Friday. I usually always end up getting called back for something, so of course my nerves are on edge. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a clean bill of health this time.


6.   The Hubs is home sick from work. He has a cold and just feels crappy all around. I wish that I could stay home and snuggle with him....not that I want to catch his coodies...but still, on days like this it would be nice to stay in bed together.


7.   I actually slept for 13hrs on Sunday night. I have NEVER done that, so I'm guessing I needed it?? Other than that...I've been up at my usual 7am no matter what.


8.   Life is pretty dull right now.....we really need some sunshine over here to perk everyone up!! I'd love to do something outdoors this weekend with the Hubs and our Girlie, but I can't really plan anything since it looks like it's going to rain all weekend. Ugh!!!!


9.   I feel like I should be making something healthy for my dinner at work tonight, but honestly, I'll probably just end up taking a "Mr. Noodles" bowl with me. Yeah I know....not exactly a meal, but I soooooo don't feel like cooking right now.


10.   Is is totally wrong that instead of getting out my steam mop to clean the floors this morning, I grabbed a Clorox wipe instead?!?!?

Everything Pink..

   I spent most of this rainy weekend making the baby shower invitations for my friend!! I must say....they are very girlie, and PINK!!! I love them!! This is totally what I would have wanted if I'd have been having a baby shower for my soon-to-be-here baby girl!! My BFF LOVES them also, and I was glad to do it for her! I even filled all 40 of them out for her to take some of the work load off of her!!! I can't wait to give them to her!!
      The Hubs and I also went out and did a little shopping yesterday, but I ended up buying some super cute little baby outfits for the shower!! The Hubs even helped!(totally not his thing to browse the baby section!!) Anywho....here a few pics. so you can see all the I've been up to and these super-cute baby things!! Hope you're all enjoyin this rainy (or not) weekend!!!!

                                                                                     
                                                                                                                                                                             

Hello Friday!!!!!

      Am I EVER glad that Friday is here!! Work was so busy this week and I'm done, done DONE!!!! I did alot of running around this week...I had to get our nephews b-day present, some groceries, and of course some supplies for the baby shower invites that I'm making for my friend. (they are super cute btw....I'll post pics. another time!!). Tomorrow is our nephews b-day party, and then I'm hoping that the Hubs and I can go out to celebrate our anniversary since we didn't get to last Friday. Just a nice dinner with the 2 of us.....*sigh*...how romantic!!! lol!!..We'll see what happens!!

      I am so ready for bed...I came home from almost 10 hours of work, started on the invitations, played with the dog(which is a job in itself), called the Government..(another job in itself), cut the grass, played with the dog some more...and now????  I'm sitting!!!! However I may have to haul my booty into the shower as there's grass stuck to my feet and I'm sure I stink...oh, and the legs could use a shave to!!! Gonna pretty myself up for the Hubs!!! hehe!!Hopefully I can keep these eyes open until he gets home..I miss him and can't wait to curl up on the couch....only 3.5 more hours to go!!! Think I'll make it?!?!?!?!?

Who Cares If.......

Who Cares If......

1.   I snore louder than the Hubs....and he sometimes has to nudge me to shut me up!!

2.   I HATE driving on the highway.....there are just to many scary drivers out there and it makes me really nervous!!!

3.   I hate doing laundry..washing, folding, putting away....yep, I hate everything about it!!!

4.   I can't stand having a top sheet on the bed!! I hate getting tangled in it and I can't stand when it comes out from the end!!

5.   I really dislike having a physical (though I'm sure there aren't to many women that do enjoy it). I get heart palpitations when I have to go......I guess it's due to that fact that I've never had good news!!!

6.   I wear the Hubs shirts to bed ALL the time!! I know, not very sexy but hey...I go for comfort!!

7.   I wear make-up every-single-day.....sometimes I don't feel like it, but I guess it's just habit!

8.   I really want a pet duck and goat. O.k...it's wierd, but they are so damn cute!!

9.   I ask a million questions.....I'm inquisitive, always have been and always will be!!!

10.  I am very anal about lawn and garden maintenance. I think the appearance of the outside of your house says alot about you. (sorry is this offends anyone!!)

11.   I'm a worry-wart.....I worry about EVERYTHING!!! The Hubs tells me that we have nothing to worry about....but I still lose sleep over things!!

12.   Baking isn't my thing....I'm good at it, but I love Cooking!!!! I just wish I had a bigger kitchen!!

13.   My hands are manly!! I have a job that makes my hands look like crap!! Though as mentioned before, I may pretty them up soon with acrylics!!

14.   The Hubs put a brand new soaker tub in the bathroom when we re-did it just for me, and, well.....I've maybe only soaked in it a handful of times.

15.   I secretly wish that the Hubs and I could have lot's of babies together that were just like our girlie!!!! Why can't there really be a stork?!?!?!  

"Ten on Tuesday"

     1. We just recently celebrated our 1 year anniversary on May 6th!! WooHoo!! The Hubs got me a card and a dozen red roses....and I think maybe something else may be on the way, but that remains to be seen!!
      2. We went to our girlies Piano competiton and she won 1st Place!!! My heart was beaming with pride!!!! I also play the piano and am thrilled that she also has a love for it!!!! I hope she never gives it up!!
      3. I'm really hating my job...it's so sucky and I have NO life at all. I can't even make a plan...AT ALL!!!!! Ugh...I'm hoping to get a permanent place soon, so hoepfully things will change for the better!!
      4.  My little nephew is turning 5 on Thursday!!! I can't believe that he is going to be 5 already!!! I remember holding him when he was born! He was sooooooo cute! I wish they stayed that little for just a little bit longer!!! He wants a skateboard for his birthday....why do I picture a trip to the hospital in the the near future?!?!?
      5.   I found ANOTHER "ding" in the side of my car!!!!! I swear that if I ever actually catch someone in the act of hitting my car door with theirs, I will actually punch them out!!! People are SO inconsiderate!!! UGH!!!!!
      6.  I am desperate to go and get some acrylic nails put on!!! I have man-hands right now and I hate it!!!! I want to feel just a little more feminine and pretty!!! (even if it IS just my hands!!)
      7.   I finally found the right pillow for our spare room bed!!! I needed it to be just the right shade of green...I looked and looked and then finally...there it was!!! Yay!!! The looking is O-V-E-R!!!
      8.   I kinda volunteered to make baby-shower invitations for my friend....what was I thinking?!?!?! I don't know. I like to torture myself and put more pressure on myslef!!! Oh well....I want it to be extra special for her since she went through some hard times..she deserves it!!
      9.   I'm starting to think that I need to make some new friends. I have a few close ones...(one that I hardly EVER see...) I just need someone that can be here for me when I need them. That may sound selfish, or even harsh...but sometimes you just need someone you can always count on.
      10.   I also bought some new "ornaments" for my gardens!!! I have such a passion for gardening and get so excited when I get new things!!! I can't wait to plant my flowers and pull my weeds!!! Seriously!!!!!!!
                                                                                      

Self-Love...

     This is something that I've been thinking about for awhile now...why can't we just love ourselves...our faults, weaknesses.....hell, even our stretch marks and saggy "parts"???? Life is so short, so why are we so critical and hard on ourselves??

    I know first hand that when you aren't able to have babies, you begin to belittle yourself...tell yourself what a failure you are..and you truly believe that. Now???.... I'm trying to get past that and realize that maybe I'm not such a "failure" after all. Maybe I'm meant for something else....what???? Who knows........the "Big Man Upstairs" has it all figured out!! hehe!!

      I know I've gained some weight, and really have no good reason for it, but really???? I have really bad knees...(X-rays to prove it and a visit to the surgeon), which is still not an excuse for NOT exercising!!!! ...A job that varies in every way from day to day that sometimes leaves me REALLY tired and worn out, and I'm just truly busy doing lot's of things...ie: making baby shower invites for one of my BFF'S!!!! ......O.K.....not good excuses....but like I said....Life is SHORT and you only live it once!!

     I'm truly going to try and exercise more and eat healthier, but I know that I'll never have the body that I had 7 yrs ago...the one that I had BEFORE I found out that I would never be a mommy.  (Yeah...I think, wait...I'm positive that that's played a huge role in my weight gain.....ya know....the sadness+failure= eating ....) It just goes hand in hand!!! But ya know what??? I'm worth having a better body.....a healthier body!!!! I just need to get my body to move..to feel motivated!!! I need all of you out there in Blogland to keep reinforcing me....to let me know that I'm worth feeling good about myself......STRETCH MARKS AND ALL!!!!! haha!!!! I-CAN-DO-THIS!!!!! (with your help of course!!) I think this is how I will find my Self-Love.....through exercise...through the endorphins that will surge through my body....time will tell....just keep me motivated!!!!!

Happy Mothers Day!!!

     Just wanted to wish all you Mothers, Mommies, Soon-to-be mommies, and those who have angel babies a very Happy Mothers Day!! You ALL rock!!! For all the times that you have been there for us, for all the guidance and love ...you're the best!!!! And for those who have gone through the worst, who are not yet mommies and who are trying really hard....you ROCK even more!!!! Your strength and courage are amazing and inspiring and my wish for you all is that one day your dreams to be a mama will come true!!  I will leave you with a picture of me and my "daughter".....the love of my life!!

                                                                                                 

Our First!!!!

   One year ago today I married the man of my dreams on the beach in the Bahamas!! What a hot, beautiful day that was!! Wish we were back there to celebrate!!! I hope that we will have many more anniversaries to come!! Here's a picture of us on the beach as husband and wife!! What a happy day!!

                                                                                         

Proud "Mama"!!!

      I'm a P-R-O-U-D Mama today!!! Our girlie placed first at her piano competition for the second year in a row!!!! I get sooooo nervous when she goes up to play, but she's always so confident!!! I love that about her!!! I'm just so proud!!! Here's the picture I snapped outside afterwards with her holding her certificate!!!!

                                                                                            

A Break

      I am feeling soooooooo in need of a break from my life!!!! And in no way do I not love my family, but the monotany of everyday is starting to get to me and it's pretty much affecting every part of my life!!!

      My job stresses the crap outta me.....my actual job is easy (sometimes), but the never knowing where I'll be working or what shift is causing me to feel anxious, stressed, and V-E-R-Y  M-O-O-D-Y !!!! The Hubs is definetly taking the brunt of all of this and it's just not fair to him.

      As I've said before, my good friend is preggers and I'm so, so happy for her, but I really don't know how much more happy, cheery baby talk I can take. It makes me feel like a really awful friend that I even feel that way, but come on......she's got to realize that it's killing me slowly and making my mood even worse!!!! I really need to find the positive me again. I miss that person!!!

      As also mentioned before, I really feel like my body has a mind of it's own right now and I'm HATING IT!!!!! I really need to get my ass is gear and make the effort everyday to workout....I think that this will really help improve my overall mood about everything really.

     I'm so glad I have this little blog of mine to complain.....what would I do without it?!?!?

"Memorable Monday"

Today started with me jumping out of bed very early to finish up the cleaning that was left!! (which consisted of steam cleaning the floors with my new steam mop, which totally ROCKS!!!!) I must say, the house is spotless.....but that's about ALL I can say about today. I know I'm supposed to be making Mondays more memorable and happy, but dang it's hard sometimes!! On the bright side though, I'm still working close to home and with my mom, so that's definetly a good thing!!! (Tomorrow may be another story!!) At least this Monday is almost over and then we'll that much closer to the weekend!! WOOHOO!!!

Another Sleepless Sunday

UGH!!! Here I am again, like every other Sunday night heading off to bed to NOT sleep! Why you ask??? Well.....I never know if I'm working day shift or afternoon shift, so there's always a good chance of the phone ringing at 5:30am to go to work.....so...yeah....I never sleep!! Oh well.....here's to another night of stress and no sleep!!! See ya tomorrow for Memorable Monday!!!!

Mother's Day Doom

I'm going to be totally honest here......I DREAD Mother's Day. I usually get pretty down in the dumps each and every year that it rolls around. I guess it's just that simple fact that I'm not technically a mom, and, well......I'm jelous!!!! Although last year our girlie gave me a card and a plant to put in my garden ( it was the first year that I was officially her step-mom) and let me tell you...it melted my heart!!! What a sweet, amazing little girl to think of me on that day...I love her so!!!! So...why do I still get this way??? Is it normal???? Am I being dramatic????? (probably!!!). I should be so thankful for this little girl being in my life and looking at me as her "other mother". I couldn't ask for better, and you know what??? I think this year I will try my very best to appreciate and be happy on this day!!! I really do have a great life (with or without any children of my own!!) And by the way......the plant came back this year!!!!! If we move, I will be digging it up and bringing it with me!! It's worth more to me than gold!!!                                                     

                                                                                       

In the Dark

   Yesterday was a C-R-A-Z-Y day for weather!!! The wind was soooooo strong that many trees (BIG ones) were down, roofs torn off and even a death in my hometown...very scary!!! I was actually nervous to go out in it and the weather people were advising everyone to stay in if possible. Well....I had my appt. with the surgeon yesterday, and I HAD to go. Let me tell you....I almost got blown onto the street into the path of an oncoming car...kinda scary when you don't have any control!!!! Anywho....I made it to my appt. and guess what????? He said it was a sprain, that my knees also hyper-extend (which of course, I already knew) and that I don't need any surgery!!! WOOHOO!!!!! I'm sooooo glad that I came through that appt. with flying colors!!!!


     So when I got to work yesterday, the power was off (as was it at our house as well). There is a generator there, but still...it's pretty dim and hard to see!!! So we did our best with what little light we had...but the best part?? We got to go home early!! YAY!!!! But I still didn't have any power at home, and I thought  "what the heck am I going to do till the Hubs gets home???" Well....I soaked in a nice, warm bath, by candle light, and then I lounged in my bed and read my book!!! It was GREAT!!!! I guess the power outage was a blessing in disguise b/c I got to have a little me time.....peaceful me time!!!! See???? Everything DOES happen for a reason!!!

Back to work Blahs!!!

      It's official....I'm back to work!! (as of yesterday that is.). I am lucky enough that I'm only working 3 mins. from home AND I'm working with my mom!! This is a good thing since we have fun at work this way!! I still wish I was at home though...I like having organization, cooking meals etc......oh well, tis' life!!
     It is sooooooo windy here today!! I'm almost expecting to see a tornado touch down!! Our big garbage bin got blown over and ripped apart in the night, but I told the Hubs to leave it until all this wind dies down or else he'll probably just get hurt. Gotta love this wacky weather!!
     Do you ever have those days where you feel like your body just isn't your own??? I feel like that today...like I just don't have any control over what it want's to do. I feel gross, heavy, full???...I don't know, maybe it's just hormones that are making me feel gross...I just hope they can straighten themselves out soon before I lose my mind!!
      We're taking another look at that house today.....fingers are still crossed on this one too!!! I won't be going as I have a doc. appt for my knee, but the Hubs and my dad are going to do a double check!!! The suspence is killing me!! lol!! I guess if it's meant to be then we'll get it!!!
     Hope you all have a terrific day today!! Be careful out in this wind as I just saw some tree branches fly by! It would be a good day..a REALLY good day to stay home!! :)

"Ten on Tuesday"

      O.k....this may be a hard Ten on Tuesday, but here we go!!
   1.   I'm STILL suffering from these damn "baby blues"!!! I hate feeling this way, ya know, bitter, angry, sad.....jelous!!! I really need to find a way to overcome these feelings and get on with life. I will never have children of my own, and that's that!!!
   2.   As I said yesterday, we found a house that we like that comes with lot's of property!! It needs to be all re-done inside, but that's a good thing, then we can do it exactly how we want!! Still waiting on that phonecall about some info. we needed first!!
   3.   I'm feeling really fat. Yeah, I know..we all have those days, but I'm starting to hate looking in the mirror or having pictures taken. I'm on meds. that are making me gain weight at a rapid speed and since my knee was screwed up, I haven't been able to exercise. SO BUMMED!!!! Hoping this will change soon!!
   4.   In regards to the knee thing, I'm off to the doctors yet again today to get the O.K. to go back to work!! (BOOOOOOOO!!!!!). It's kind of dpressing to think about since I do love being at home so much, but I guess I need to get back into some kind of routine, and hopefully start doing some exercise again!!
   5.     I miss our girlie!! I can never say this to much!! I can't even imagine how hard it is for the Hubs not being able to raise his little girl. Things happen, I know, but he's a good dad and I wish with all my heart that he could have more time with her!!(me too, of course!!). Oh well...we just have to try and make the best of the little time that we do get to spend together!!
   6.   I don't think I can take anymore rainy, grey, dull days!!! It's like that today and is supposed to be this way for at least another 2 days!!! UGH!!! I really may have to go to the tanning bed just to make myself feel better!! (after the docs. though or else I will NEVER hear the end of it!!)
   7.   I really need to start drinking more water. I hate drinking it, but since we got one of those water coolers, it's not quite as bad!! I just hate making all those trips back and forth to the bathroom all day...especially at work!! But, it's good for you and your skin, so I guess I better go fill my bottle up and get started!!
   8.   It's about a week and a half till our first wedding anniversary and I STILL haven't thought of a thing to get the Hubs. Maybe we will just have to go for dinner or something....I don't know!! He's a guy....they aren't like us girls who love diamonds and flowers!!! I'll have to get him a new tool or something!!
   9.   My crafting has been on hold since before Easter when I made all that stuff...it's like my brain doesn't want to work and I just can't come up with any thing good!!! EEK!! That's so not like me and it's very frustrating!! I need to make some Mother's Day cards and I just can't come up with anything I like!! I hate when this happens.....I've just got to ride it out till another idea pops into this head of mine!!
   10.   I'm heading out soon to pick up my knee X-rays...whoopee!!! I have no idea what a "normal" knee should look like, but I'm going to take a peek anyways to see if I can see anything abnormal!! I go to the surgeon this Thursday, which I'm now thinking is a waste fo time, but who knows, maybe there really is something going on in there!! I'll let ya know!!